**Erin, from one of my absolute favorite blogs, Blue Eyed Bride, was gracious enough to write an incredibly honest post about how much life changes from one child to two. I know I have gone through all of these emotions this week when I think about sweet Charlotte. Thank you, Erin for sharing your story—you are truly a talented writer, and an amazing mommy!**
I am so excited for my friend, Kendall, and her new arrival. When Kendall asked me to guest blog for her this week, my heart went right back to the weeks before we welcomed our second baby boy.
My mind was full of worry. My heart was already completely full of love for Hudson, our first. I already loved our unborn baby so much. I couldn’t even imagine how much my heart could grow to accommodate all of that love once he arrived.
And the day that Hayes was born was so completely bittersweet. There isn’t a better word for it. We heard his sweet cry for the first time and it was instant. He was ours and we loved him completely right then. I couldn’t wait to hold him and kiss his head and be able to see Todd holding him for the first time.
When it was time for Hudson to come meet his baby brother for the first time, I felt some huge nerves. I had this overwhelming fear that Hudson would look different to me. And he did! For two years he was our tiny baby, and then all of a sudden he was our big boy. He was four times the size of his baby brother and he grew up right before my eyes in that moment.
I had to look away from him to keep from crying. My heart was overjoyed for our new arrival yet my postpartum hormones were making my heart ache when I looked at my big boy. How did two years fly by so quickly? Just two years prior to that I was holding him in the hospital and here I was, holding his baby brother and mourning the time that escaped us so quickly.
All of this was really just amplified by crazy hormones. Because today, fifteen months after we welcomed sweet baby Hayes, I know there was no reason to feel any sadness. I can still clearly remember those emotions, but they have been completely overshadowed by the fun and the love that we’ve all had since Hayes was born.
Life got twice as crazy. And twice as loud. And twice as messy. But we can’t imagine a day when Hayes wasn’t part of our family. Hudson will never remember a day without his baby brother. And all I can think is that we’ve not only added this sweet, wild, funny little baby boy to our family, but we gave Hudson a best friend for life.
Fifteen months later, we’ve really found our groove. Of course it didn’t take that long to find it, but each day still just gets a little bit easier. As Hudson gets more independent (and potty-trained! woo!) he grows up a little more. Hayes is kind of all over the place and turning into a full-fledged toddler, but he is also becoming more independent.
And soon we’ll be thinking about baby number three, right? Ha! We’ll see…